Don't let the "Mean Girls" get to you...

Today, I was prepared to write about adult mean girls. Prior to the base that I am currently at, I had heard the headlines about adult mean girls. Truthfully, I thought it was hype...I had never met an adult mean girl in real life.  However, as I became more involved at this base, I realized that I found the breeding ground of that rare animal called, "Adult Mean Girls." The more volunteer and leadership positions that I took on, the more that I made myself a target for these adult mean girls.

I was sure that I would be writing the reasons as to why there seem to be more adult mean girls within military communities and I came up with some theories that made a lot of sense (at least to me).  My first theory was that girls who were not popular growing up have the chance to start fresh and still have a chip on their shoulder for how someone may have treated them growing up. Another theory was that some people are just more miserable being away from family and their support system and like to take it out on others. I tried to analyze the actions that I saw by these people; however, the truth is that the mean girl with the biggest vengeance towards me liked me until we were at the same event and everyone raved over how cute my daughter was, but nobody said a comment about her daughter the same age.

The adult mean girls on my base made it so that I did not like volunteering. I continued to volunteer, but instead of the normal "feel good" feeling that comes from giving of your time for something great, it felt like a chore. As of yesterday, I had enough with mean girls and I was ready to just get to my new base...and selfishly, I already had it in my head that I did not want to volunteer when I got there. I know that you are not supposed to feed a bully by letting them know that they have gotten to you, but the truth is yes-- the mean girls get in my head and it hurts.

Today, I had a change of heart. Not about the mean girls...the facts are that they are out there, there seem to be more on military bases, and I will probably always run into a mean girl somewhere. However, I am not going to let them get me so far down though that I stop volunteering. Volunteering had felt like a thankless job...which the truth is that a lot of volunteer opportunities in military communities are thankless.  As nice as it feels though to get acknowledged, I do not volunteer for the pat on the back...I do it to help other military families-- because I have a heart for others.

What brought this change of heart today? Someone that cared enough to make sure that I did get acknowledged before I switch bases. That person recommended me for a Base Commander's Coin and Certificate of Excellence.  The irony is that it was for the smallest of my volunteer positions. However, that is what made it the most special...the fact that it was a little thing that I dis that got noticed and that the acknowledgment today was totally unexpected.